101 Challenges:
International daft stuffLee
Video: All about Lee by Lindsay
Lee on Lee
Here's some of Lee, but in pictures.
How
Ya!
I'm a 32 year old male, well 30 year old male really since my parents
choose that for me at the age of 2 after being born a hemaphrodite.
That explains the unisex name.
I may be 32 but act way younger (my friends will tell you it's no
act) and when I grow up I want to be a lottery winner.
I was brought up in a medium sized nothing special town called Kirkcaldy
in Scotland. Thanks to this fact I love to travel, as would you if
you came from there.
I was an ugly duckling (or so my brother kept telling me) until I
was 25. Then, overnight, as if by magic, I became beautiful, well
not magic it was a hair cut that done it really. Since then I have
been impowered with such confidence and style that I look almost bisexual.
To be honest though, I am Samson, I know it's down to my hair, God
let me keep it.
I am the modern day Peter Pan, I like dressing up in green leggings
and flying around. Seriously (if I can be for a second) I never ever,
ever want to grow up. This may explain my enquiries into hair implants
for the future and the teeth whitening I have already received (see
picture on right).
I like the simple pleasures in life such as;
Breathing, plucking my nasal hair, using hair products, farting and
blaming others, tying
my shoelaces (still can't get over this achievement) and of course,
reading The Alchemist.
I don't like; Women with moustaches (seriously no messing, I really
do hate it) being told off, running the Rat Race, and the cold (it
makes me look smaller - that I can't afford)
I'm very competitive and won't back down from any challenge. Hold
it, no hair cutting or teeth yellowing will be done. Combining this
fearlessness with the love of travelling makes 101 Challenges the
perfect idea. I especially like to win things where my brother Lindsay
(another hermaphrodite) is involved.
Bring it on!
Lindsay on Lee
Lindsay on Lee
I
still remember the day Lee was adopted into our family. Beautifully
dressed in a gorgeous green floral summer frock and wearing the
cutest pink Wellington boots you ever did see. She was angelic.
A true blessing. I always wanted a sister.
I remember Mummy telling me “Lindsaykins, the Stork got shot
down today as he was passing over town, by Farmer Jenkins"
(the Bastard)
The Stork landed on our doorstep and as the stunning bird gasped
his final breathe, he handed us a beautiful little baby. The Stork
then said that we must look after this child and treat her as our
own.
Later that night, we had Duck or Goose or something like that. It
was gorgeous and it made me forget the pain of no longer being Mummy’s
little Princess.
But bedtime came, and as I cuddled into my Glow-Worm I began to
cry. For days, weeks, months and years, I cried and cried and cried.
How could I make Mummy love me more than this… this Beast!
Happiness had deteriorated into sadness, and sadness had quickly
soured to anger. I once tried to smother the little bugger with
my beautifully woven blanket. However, the 4” wide gaps between
the impeccably knitted patches made this nigh-on-impossible.
So… we had to get along.
A few years passed and Lindsay, for some stupid, unknown and bizarre
reason, began to look up to his smaller and mentally younger, older
brother. Because of this maturing change, and the conflicts of equally-shared-low-mentality,
the two now get along like a house on fire.
Yet…
There are still times when Lee will throw a hissy-fit like the ones
he did when I stood on his My Little Pony, or set fire to his Gummy
Bear Doll. And because of these dummy spitting tantrums, I will
always let him think that his tan is better, his hair is sexier,
his teeth are whiter, his ass is smaller… Mummy and I know
the truth.
The above said, there is no other person that I would rather do
101 Challenges with. Thats because there is nobody else I would
rather beat.
He aint heavy (I am), he's my brother.
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