Dr. Browning falsely diagnosed Myra last week, leading her to believe that she may have a terminal illness. Of course, we know he’s fibbing, but even still, ever since the diagnosis was made, we can’t help going all misty eyed and getting a little catch in our throats every time we think about Myra. What’s with that?!
If nothing else, the very idea of Myra leaving us has made us realise just how much we love her. What’s more, she’s given us some pure 24-carat gold moments this past fortnight – gold like the many, many sovereign rings that adorn her lovely, motherly hands.
Here are some highlights:
Top shouts
She’s given us some classic lines recently:
“God is like the tooth-fairy”
She revealed her own novel interpretation of Christianity to Dirk whilst his son Will was laid-up in a hospital bed, qualifying her statement with this: “if you stop believing in him, he stops paying out”. We’d like to hear more of her analogies from religion and folk-lore. We reckon there’s a good kids’ book in it.
“He looks like he’s permanently hypnotised”
A brilliant observation on dopey, sinister, good-guy gone bad, Will Savage. Here in the online team, we also noticed that, when Will's being all creepy, he looks a LOT like variouswildlife. See for yourself in this gallery...
"I wanted dunking in the Holy Waters of Lourdes, not the stinky River Dee"
Witnessing a drunk Myra topple off the jetty into the River Dee was a highlight, not only of this week, but of any week ever.
Myra drops some truth bombs
She’s never been what you would call a wall-flower, but, conscious that these may be her last few days left, she decided it was time to let people know what she really thought of them…
On Tony Hutchinson, local businessman and pillar of the community: “Your tiny heart is as big as your tiny brain…no wonder they all cheat on you”
On her dear old mother, who brought her into the world and nurtured her into adulthood: “The only thing lower than her morals are her boobs. Takes off her bra and she sweeps the floor”
On local barmaid and shop-proprietor, Frankie Osborne (or ‘Frankiestein’, as Myra dubbed her) “Face it Frankie, you’re common as muck”
On Nancy Osborne, teacher, journalist, mother: “…like little Yoda, waddling around the village”
On her husband, Darren Osborne “…the Take That reject, with the greasy hair”
The best moment of all, however, was when Dr. Browning walked in, just on cue, to deliver the good news that Myra had been given the all clear. She looked as if she actually did want to die…
The Love Affair of Big Daddio and Mama Bear
Overall though, there has been one really sweet thing to come out of this past fortnight, and that’s the way that adversity has pushed Dirk and Myra closer together. She may be a mother, but she’s also a woman, and Dirk, with his ‘beautiful soul’ and ‘body to match’ (her words, not ours) is just the man to treat her right. Long live Big Daddio and Mama Bear.
Tell us why you love Myra so much by commenting below…
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WATCH...James Atherton talk about his character in this vid
