Friends:

You gotta have a gal like Monica around. Who else is going to clean up that disgusting mess you left next to the toilet?

Sure they drive you crazy the rest of the time. But have you ever tried cleaning an oven? Do you know how many bits it has? And the stuff is just glued onto there. That’s why there’s Monicas in the world.

But Monica’s not just a clean-freak. Oh no. She’s also ultra-bossy and highly competitive. You can see why Chandler fell for her. And why she’s done so well as a chef. They’re always screaming at people – I should know, I’ve watched television. Odd though that a secretly fat child would move into the world of food as a career. There’s a couple of years therapy right there.

Other than Chandler, her love life has been spotty to say the least. They’re either too old, too young, too insane, too much of a bozo, her brother or Tom Seleck. Her ingrained competitive streak could explain the lack of that special someone in her life. Once she’s hurled crockery at them while playing Ker-plunk or got them in a headlock during a quiet game of charades, they tend to leave, move town and change their name by deed poll.